


Gods and Monsters

by catZY



Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Greek Mythology, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-07
Updated: 2017-05-07
Packaged: 2018-10-29 08:08:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10849917
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/catZY/pseuds/catZY
Summary: After the first time they assemble, Tony finds out his new teammates are demigods like he is. This is the story of how they figure out cohabitation, and maybe find a lost Winter Soldier along the way.





	Gods and Monsters

**Author's Note:**

> I got the idea from Rick Riordan's series, but it's not based off any of those stories. I wanted to explore unusual Greek god-Avenger combinations. I feel like Tony is usually somehow related to Hephaestus and Clint is usually somehow related to Apollo. I wanted to mix it up a bit. I hope you have as much fun reading this as I did writing it. If there's any errors with my Greek mythology knowledge, feel free to point it out in the comments.

            _And there came a day unlike any other, when earth’s mightiest heroes were united against a common threat. On that day, the Avengers were born—to fight the foes no single hero could withstand…_

The newly formed Avengers sat around a conference room, weary but victorious after two straight days of fighting. An army of six against an army of thousands.

Tony spun around in his chair hard enough to circle around several times. When he finally came to a stop, he wiggled his chair the last few inches so it turned to face the conference table once more. He tapped his fingers against the arm of his chair. Finally, he couldn’t take the silence anymore.

“Sooo, is anyone going to address the giant polka-dotted elephant in the room?” He asked the room at large.

Thor looked confused. Banner didn’t twitch from where he had his head resting in his arms—he might have fallen asleep. Widow raised one lethal eyebrow at Tony. Hawkeye remained impassive.

Cap was probably too polite to ignore a direct question because he was the only one who responded. “What are you talking about, Stark? What elephant?”

“Okay, so no one’s going to say it. Fine, I’ll say it. We just fought for two days straight. Two days. With no breaks. All of us down on the ground or in the air for more than forty-eight hours. So, Cap and Banner have got the serum. And Thor’s…well, he’s apparently a god, which, buddy, you’re going to have to explain what a god is doing fighting with us. But Hawkeye and Widow? You’re supposed to be mortal.”

“So are you.” Hawkeye said.

Tony dipped his head in Hawkeye’s direction. “True enough.”

After several long moments of weighty silence where no one spoke, Tony sighed explosively and said false-cheerfully, “Alright, well, that cleared everything up. I’m going to go home and sleep for a week and then fix my suit, but afterwards, you’re all welcome at the Tower to chill and eat my food. We’ll make it a party.”

His announcement was met with blank faces and wordless mouths.

But before Tony could leave, Hawkeye suddenly dropped a name into the silence. “Hephaestus.”

Hephaestus. Greek god of blacksmiths. The exception that proves the rule that gods are perfect and beautiful.

Tony froze and sat back down. “Well, you’re in the right pantheon, but sorry, you shot wide off the mark.” He grinned at his own archery pun.

Hawkeye’s brow furrowed in thought. He shook his head and looked to Widow, clearly seeking help. Widow gave Tony a considering look. Tony struggled not to shiver under that icy gaze.

Widow said, “He’s the Merchant of _Death_.”

Hawkeye’s brows rose in surprise. “You’re Hades’ kid? I would not have pegged that. What, with the engineering and everything.”

Hades. Greek god of the Underworld, ruler of the dead. Also, rich. And Persephone’s husband.

“Grandkid,” Tony corrected. “He was my mom’s dad. And what, you think every single engineer, blacksmith, carpenter, and so on, is descended from Hephaestus? By that logic, you must be Apollo’s descendant.”

“Okay, fair. And no, not Apollo’s kid.” Hawkeye’s ears suddenly flushed the faintest bit pink. He mumbled, “Aphrodite’s my mom.”

Aphrodite. Greek goddess of beauty and love. Won an apple that started a war that ended up turned into a film with Brad Pitt in it.

“What?” Tony exclaimed in excited glee. “Oh my god, your codename should be Cupid.”

Hawkeye’s ears flushed red. “Shut up. Like I haven’t heard that joke a hundred times before.”

Widow smirked at Hawkeye before turning to Cap, “Captain, you don’t look surprised.”

Cap startled under Widow’s sudden scrutiny. “Pardon?”

“You don’t look surprised to find out that two of your teammates are descended from Greek gods.”

“Of course I’m surprised, but that kind of pales in comparison to waking up in a new century and fighting off aliens. And well, we already know about Thor. Not so surprising that other pantheons exist, too.”

Widow smiled like a spider feeling vibrations in the web. “Maybe. Or,” she paused before smiling wider, “you already know of the Greek pantheon because you’re a descendant, too.”

The widening of Cap’s eyes said it all.

Tony and Hawkeye—really, Tony should stop calling his new teammates by their codenames out of uniform—turned to each other in unison and shouted out, “Athena!”

Cap scratched the back of his blond head, clearly a nervous gesture, and then sighed and said, “No, though that honestly probably would have been better. I could have used a little more wisdom in my life. No, my father is Ares.”

Ares. Greek god of bloodlust and chaotic war. Also, a giant douchebag.

Huh. That was even more unexpected than Barton being Aphrodite’s kid. But it did kind of explain the nonstop fighting even when Rogers had been a shrimp.

Rogers continued through gritted teeth, “To say he was displeased when I was born sickly and weak would be an understatement.”

“Yikes,” Tony said, somewhat awkwardly, “and I thought I had daddy issues.”

Rogers smiled grimly. Though, maybe calling that baring of teeth a smile was a misnomer.

“Hey, Banner, what about you? Have you been touched by divinity?” Barton asked a now awake Banner somewhat jokingly.

Banner grimaced. “Touched by divinity.” He snorted. “How apt. Hera cursed me while I was still in the womb to punish my mom even though my mom was the victim in all this. I don’t know why that jealous cow doesn’t just take all her spite out on her rapist husband!”

Hera. Greek goddess of marriage and fidelity, which was truly ironic because she was married to the one god who could never seem to keep his dick in his pants. Also mostly known for tormenting the poor women her husband sleeps with.

Tony shared wide-eyed glances with Barton and Rogers. Unless Tony was completely misunderstanding the situation, Bruce had just admitted that he was Zeus’ kid.

Zeus. Greek god of justice and lightning. Also the god of not keeping it in his pants.

Dear lord. Now that—that was the true mother lode of daddy issues.

Lightning suddenly streaked against previously blue skies. They could all see the flashes through the conference room window.

Banner stood up so fast his chair fell backwards. He snarled at the window. “What, you think a little lightning’s going to scare me? Well, fuck you, too!”

Tony was partly terrified, but mostly amazed at the balls on this man. Rogers put a restraining hand on Banner’s balled up fist, which was starting to turn the faintest bit green.

Banner glanced down at Rogers at the touch.

Rogers said, “Come on, I know you’re angry. I would be, too. But if you change here, the only people you’ll hurt is us.”

Banner took a deep breath that was only a little shaky and sat back down.

Everyone startled—except for Romanov—when Thor set his hammer down on the table with a thunk.

Thor clasped Banner’s shoulder, and said, while looking fiercely out the window, “Worry not, my shieldbrother, for he is not the only one who commands lightning. If he seeks retribution, his weapon will not reach his target, for you, all of you,”—here, he swept a solemn and princely gaze around the room—“are under my protection.”

Tony patted Thor on one of his bulging biceps and said, “Thanks, buddy, but hopefully the whole protection thing will go both ways.”

Thor nodded and smiled brightly. “Of course, son of Stark, grandson of Hades, such is the way of shieldbrothers and,” he nodded at Romanov, “shieldsisters.”

Tony clapped his hands together and said, “Okay, well, this has been a fun rollercoaster, but I actually do need to sleep, so!”

As Tony was getting up to leave, he saw Thor reach over and unsubtly poke Romanov in the shoulder. Romanov rolled her eyes. Thor poked harder. Romanov sighed exasperatedly.

Romanov spoke, “Well, I guess there’s one last secret to share, since if I don’t share it, Thor’s probably going to shout it from the rooftops.”

Thor looked reproachful. “I would never reveal your secrets in such a manner.”

Tony said, “Wait a sec, you’re not saying you’re Thor’s…”

Romanov and Thor both turned to Tony and shouted, “No!”

Tony held his hands up. “Okay, okay, no need to shout, just a wild guess.”

Romanov said, “There are no deities in my bloodline. But I was adopted. By Loki. A century ago.”

Loki. Norse god of mischief, lies, and chaos. That actually explained a lot about Romanov.

“A century ago?” Rogers asked, surprised.

“Well, they do have golden apples in Norse mythology, too, you know. Though they’re more useful than the Greek ones.” She cast a sardonic look at Barton and he rolled his eyes. “They can prolong life, even in mortals.”

“Huh.” Rogers looked thoughtful.

Tony looked around the room, somewhat wildly. “Anyone else have any earth-shattering secrets to share? No? Nobody? Fury, the one-eyed pirate, you gonna pop up now?”

Fury’s voice crackled over the loudspeaker in the room. “Go home, Stark. Everybody else, you’re welcome to find temporary lodgings here or elsewhere. Come back in twenty four hours. We’ve got a whole city to fix.”

Tony gave his teammates a sardonic wave goodbye and got the hell out of Dodge. He hadn’t been kidding, he really needed to sleep. Right now. Even if sleep was for the dead.

As he stumbled like a zombie from the de-armoring platform to his workshop corner cot, his mind was filled with hazy portents of gods and monsters in his near future. But that was probably just his sleep-deprived mind taking the revelations of the past hour and running wild. After all, he wasn’t an Apollo descendent—he couldn’t read the future. Probably.

 


End file.
